Today I want to give up 

Today I want to give up

I want to stay hidden under my covers where nobody else’s judgement, but my own can touch me.

I want to avoid the tests, the homework, the pop quizzes, the lectures that have no real value once I die.

I don’t want to eat because I have high hopes that it will increase my ability to evaporate so I don’t have to step in front of a city bus because I don’t want to disappoint my mother any further.

I don’t want to be depressed anymore, but that’s the only true feeling I feel anymore.

I want to totally avoid people but then I also want to be wrapped up in my mothers arms while I cry about the million things that break my heart everyday.

I want to find a solution to the reason as to why I’m never good enough or why I can’t be better, but I can’t.

The overwhelming feeling of inadequacy is exactly why I must stay under my covers to avoid misjudgment for yet another day.

So today… I have given up.

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2 comments

  1. ... · November 7, 2016

    I kind of know how you feel, no matter what I did I was never good enough for my dad. I wish I could just vanish or go back in time and make sure I was never born in the first place. I hope you have a nice day/

    Like

    • flamesinthesilverlining · November 7, 2016

      Thank you for understanding and I hope you have a great day as well

      Like

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